This morning I begin a new study on the word “husband” as I have been in the family realm for some time now first with “wife”, then “home”, and then “family”. It is only good process to make my way through all members of the family as I study. This first one was a bit tough as I find myself looking at “the fall” from grace in the beginning. God created man and woman to be husband and wife. And what he created was “very good” indeed. And then He allowed them to be tested by Satan. And whereas it was woman or the wife who succumbed to the temptation first, both of them took part and fell out of grace together. And that is where we are now.
“16To the woman he said,
“I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing;
in pain you shall bring forth children.
Your desire shall be contrary to your husband,
but he shall rule over you.”
— Genesis 3:16 (ESV)
This verse is the one I am going to spend my focus on for the purpose of this post. The rest of “the fall” are important to know, but is here that I am writing about. You see, it is that last pat of the verse that really gets things in me this morning, “Your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you.”
As noted earlier, God created man and woman to be husband and wife and it was “very good”. Here we see that due to sin and “the fall”, husband and wife will be at odds. Where the wife was to submit to her husband and husband to lead, guard, and care for his wife (ESV commentary), it is now that wife will be at odds with her husband and husband will “rule” over his wife. This is not as God intended.
As husband I am not to “rule over” my wife. Yes, I am to be head of the household and am to be revered by my wife, I am not to “rule over” her, I am to love and care for her.
“25Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.” – Ephesians 5:25-27 (ESV)
We can see that Paul teaches for man to come back and work to defeat the results of “the fall”. We as husbands are not to “rule over” our wives, we are to love them, cleanse them, present them without “spot or wrinkle” so they “might be holy and without blemish”. We are, as noted earlier from my ESV commentary of Genesis 3:16, to lead, guard, and care for them. We are to make it they are lifted up and in the proper place of importance to us and to the LORD.
Yes, we were meant to be the head of our household, but it is just that the head of the household and not ruler of it. We were not created to “rule over”, but to lead, guard, and care. We were meant to be the husband, not the king. Thanks to “the fall” we are naturally at odds with our wives and we have to get back to what God intended. As we stay in God’s Word, we find continued reminders of what God intended and it is up to us to study and know of our role as husbands, to lead, guard, and care for our wives.
What is your view of the husband? Are they to be the ruler of all, including their wife? What if we looked more closely to find that we are to lead, guard, and care for our wives and not “rule over” them?
Trevor's Thoughts 