There are many qualities that are instrumental in helping us to avoid falling away from Christ.

“⁵For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, ⁶and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, ⁷and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love. ⁸For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.” – 2 Peter 1:5-8 (ESV)

Each of these qualities, as Peter writes, leads to the next and it is important that we observe each of them to maintain and grow our “knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ”. I also notice that all these qualities lead to the ultimate quality of our Lord Jesus Chris which is LOVE.

I have studied some of these qualities over the past few years and will continue to study them and others as I look to understand and grow my knowledge each day. With love I have spent a good amount of time studying and have found that whatever the situation or circumstances I find myself in, when I am demonstrating love for those around me, all can be overcome.

I want to be clear and state that just because I love I get everything I want and all is made glorious in my world. What I am referring to is that when I love, all is ultimately overcome by God. He provides the resolutions that are needed and not necessarily the resolutions we are looking for.

I look back at the life of my grandparents and the comfort by which they seemed to have in themselves and their lives. I see how they lived with the simple means and never “wanted” for much of anything other than to have relationships with their family. What I also remember about them is the LOVE they demonstrated at all times. They did for others without expectation of anything in return. They only relaxed when the work was done and then only for a short while until they recognized the chance to demonstrate love again by making coffee for everyone.

I do not want to seem like everything was perfect for my grandparents. For sure they had their struggles, but the key thing was that those struggles were their own and when in the presence of everyone else, the self-control they demonstrated led to the love they shared with each of those around them.

I will be taking the demonstrated advice of my grandparents as I go forward. I will be demonstrating the self-control with will lead to the demonstration of love. My goal is not to be better than others, only to the best that God has intended me to be.

When you look out, are your demonstrating self-control? Are you looking out for yourself by frankly, looking out for the good of everyone around you? Will you demonstrate self-control with the goal of demonstrating love?

“¹But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. ²For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, ³heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, ⁴treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, ⁵having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people.” – 2 Timothy 3:1-5 (ESV)

When I read these verses I am taken aback and what I could become, or rather what I am, with maintaining self-control. Paul lines it out and it is up to me to be fully aware daily to avoid as best I can.

I have to believe that man does not set out to be as described in the verses above. I am pretty sure that I do not wake in the morning looking for the opportunity to be abusive, ungrateful, unholy, heartless. I will say that though I may not wake looking for it, as a man and sinner, it is in my nature to gravitate toward those actions and where it starts is with my lack of self-control. Without self-control, I am not able to settle myself into doing the work of God and will simply react to that which is happening around me.

Just above the passage I quoted from 2 Timothy, Paul writes of how we should be acting each day. He outlines the actions that we are to be taking and again, it all starts with maintaining self-control.

“²²So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. ²³Have nothing to do with foolish, ignorant controversies; you know that they breed quarrels. ²⁴And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, ²⁵correcting his opponents with gentleness.” – 2 Timothy 2:22-25 (ESV)

No, Paul does not use the word self-control, however he speak of being gentle. And in order to be gentle one must be deliberate in their actions and if one is deliberate in action then they are demonstrating self-control over their actions. Paul gives the actions of the Lord’s servant, me, in verse 22 and further explains through those verses that immediately follow. I am held to the standard of living as the Lord’s servant and in doing so must adhere to the actions outlined and that all begins with my deliberate self-controlled actions.

I am encouraged when reading Paul’s letters to Timothy as they are written not just to Timothy, but to me as well. I am given instructions as to how to be a Christian and what actions I should be taking as well as those that I should be avoiding. It is up to me to continue my study of Gods’ Word through my deliberate action so that I am able to maintain my self-control and avoid the actions that are natural to me as a man and sinner.

What actions are you taking each day? Are you aware of the self-control needed so that others will see God in you? Are you willing to take deliberate self-controlled actions and avoid those that are natural to you as a sinner?

I have traits that are used for the spreading of the Gospel.

“⁵I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well. ⁶For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands, ⁷for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.” – 2 Timothy 1:5-7 (ESV)

Paul, speaking to Timothy, reminds him of the Christlike character traits that he has been entrusted. Timothy had been raised rightly and only needs to be reminded of those characteristics that were instilled in him from the start.

I to have been entrusted with traits of Christ from those that came before me. And for those I must remember to be grateful. For, whereas here in this world, my mother and grandmother instilled those in me, I have to know where they ultimately came from. Where did they get them, but from those that came before them and from their constant study and trusting of God and His Word. I know what it is and how I should be acting here in this world. I have/had the examples of what right looks like and it is up to me to follow those examples in my walking of this world. Now, I may have been introduced to the traits by those close to me here in this world, but my understanding and reminder of those are from my constant study and trusting of God and His Word.

I have/had examples to follow here in this world, and I have the ultimate example in Christ as to how to use the traits given to me by God. Jesus demonstrated those traits each day in His walk in this world, “power and love and self-control”. He came before me to show me what right looks like and how I am to use the gifts He gave, and for that, I am grateful. It is up to me to continue using the gifts given by God to spread His gospel.

Who was your example of what right looks like? Were they demonstrating the traits of Christ? Were you aware that they instilled those traits in you, and that God gave them to you?

“⁸I desire that in every place the men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling; ⁹likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, ¹⁰but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works.” – 1 Timothy 2:8-10 (ESV)

This passage is often misconstrued in that somehow men are those that are called on to be the bringers of the gospel and women should be somewhere in the background supporting them. That could not be further from the truth in the way I understand it.

Paul is bringing attention to what is the important part in spreading the gospel, just that, spreading the gospel. The idea is to not draw attention to “ourselves” but to the gospel and the name of Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior. If I were to display “anger or quarreling” I am taking the attention off of Christ, who is love, and putting myself on stage for all to see. Likewise, women that get all dressed up with fancy outer coverings are drawing attention to themselves and away from Christ who was modest and simple in His approach.

Now don’t get me wrong, I do believe that I must be passionate with my love and devotion to Christ, and I should dress my best for Him. I have only to be careful that my passion and dress are for His glory and not to make me look or appear to be greater than I am, a sinner in need of grace. My actions and appearance should be to draw attention to Christ and not me. It is a sin for me to do anything that may cause another man to stumble and if those men or women are looking at me, then it is difficult for them to see Christ in me.

I believe we all should bring others to Christ and our actions and appearances have the chance to do just that or distract them. I choose to bring them to Christ and therefor will exercise self-control in my actions and appearance to be sure that others are seeing Christ in me.

Your actions and appearance, what do they say about you? What do they say about your relationship with Christ? Are you self-controlled so that the world will see Christ in you and not be looking at you?

When I read this mornings passage as I study the words “self-control”, I was taken aback by the idea that with self-control, there is no law. Now, I have to say that just reading that and with things taken just at the words therein, I am not getting the full story.

“¹⁸But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. ²²But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³gentleness, self-control: against such things there is no law.” – Galatians 5:18 & 22-23 (ESV)

And there you have it. Not just that self-control to be out from under the law, but led by the fruit of the Spirit and all nine of those characteristics. I am to be bound by those characteristics and when doing so, I will find myself above the law.

Now I know that as I live here in the world, there are laws that I must abide by as a member of society. What I need to remember is that as I live the characteristics of the fruit of the Spirit, the law of man pales in comparison to the model and discipline I have under the law of God. Gods Law is far more stringent than that of man.

If for some reason there is a conflict between the law of man and the law of God, I will err on the side of Gods Law. In doing so, I fully accept any punishment that man may give for the punishment for breaking the law of God and disappointing Him is far worse than anything that man would do.

Paul was imprisoned and eventually killed for disobeying mans law in order to follow the law of God. Whereas spending years imprisoned and being killed are not considered desirable, Paul gladly took the punishment as opposed to giving in just to satisfy man. He demonstrated the nine characteristics of the fruit of the Spirit including, but not limited to, self-control and rose above the law of man to bring glory to God.

What laws are you focused on adhering to on a daily basis? Are you looking to live by the fruit of the Spirit each day? Will you be able to count yourself above the law as you demonstrate your self-control?

“²⁴Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. ²⁵Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. ²⁶So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. ²⁷But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.” – 1 Corinthians 9:24-27 (ESV)

It is fascinating at the discipline of athletes, musicians, artists, and frankly anyone that has become great at what they do. Their greatness is largely based on the work that they put into their craft. Yes, some are naturally gifted and things come easy to them, however those are the anomaly and the percentage of those that put in the work far out number the anomalies.

I have to remember that my walk with Christ is not a cake walk and I have to work continuously at it. I want to great in the eyes of Christ and the only way for me to get there (though I know that I will never reach the pinnacle) I have to remain disciplined.

I speak to my boys about the things that they do and what I say to them often is to be deliberate in their actions. I remind them not to go after things without thinking them through and understanding the greater consequences of their actions. Yes, there are times when things come so fast and furious that the decision making process is a bit muddied and the deliberate actions we take are left to chance, those times should be met with self-control and discipline based on what is known and on previous experience with fast decisions before.

I have been left to do the work of God here in this world and in doing so, I owe it to Him to give it my best. My best is to “discipline my body and keep it under control” so that my actions will be in the best interest of the work of Christ and not of my own idea of winning or losing. I must remain deliberate and exercise self-control in all of my dealings to be sure that I am working for Christ.

When you are in situations, how do you approach them? Are you able to sit and work exclusively for Christ in all that you do? Are you being deliberate and exercising self-control in all of your dealings?

“¹Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: ‘It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.’ ⁹But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. ²But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. ⁵Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer, but then comet together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” – 1 Corinthians 7: 1, 9, 2, & 5 (ESV)

I know, these verses are completely out of order as written by Paul. I will admit that when looking at the verses, I was not quite sure what would be the reasoning for my study of these verses as pertains to self-control and me. And then it hit me, maybe it was not meant specifically for me and that was what brought me to write them here in the order at which I did.

Being married for the past almost 24 yrs, I have to say that I love my wife, Lori, and we have a good relationship with one another in all areas of our marriage. It has been a long while since we were separate individuals, and I will say that I for one fell into verse 9 as written where, before we were married, I found it difficult to exercise self-control.

In today’s society, I am very confident when I say that is certainly prevalent for people in relationships to exercise self-control as well. And because of that, there are people marrying based on the emotion found in the relationship and that emotion alone. I have to commend them for taking that approach and following Christian teachings and actions. I will also say that because of the emotional approach to the relationship, there is something missing which causes the relationship to erode over time.

As mentioned by Paul in verse 5, there should be times when we should be apart so that we can “devote yourselves to prayer”. I am sure that this is missing in a great number of these young relationships based on the emotional attachment they have to one another. Spending all of your time with one person is difficult as there is still a need for the individual to express themselves and as such they should be engaged with God to explore what that expression will look like.

We have to be careful with that time away from one another and be sure that the time is not too great that we lose sight of one another and fall prey to the temptations that Satan presents as we are still human and can succumb to our lack of self-control. We have to remember to reconnect with one another often to be sure that our relationship with one another does not erode and we drift apart looking for the next thing to satisfy our emotional need.

I do not claim to be a relationship expert, I can only say that Lori and I have been married for almost 24 years at the writing of this and even though we have had our moments, as I mentioned earlier, we have a pretty healthy relationship altogether. We are still working on it and I encourage you to do the same. I have to remember that to be healthy, I may have to demonstrate my self-control and step away to commune with God on next steps in growing my relationship with Lori.

When you think about your relationships, what are you basing those on? Are you holding to the emotion of that relationship, and what happens when the emotions fade? Are you able to exercise the self-control needed to step away and commune with God for what is next?

“²⁸A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls.” – Proverbs 25:28 (ESV)

Thinking about how a city, neighborhood, and/or separates and protects itself from the outside is with a wall or fence. This barrier is there to not only separate, but also protects. I know that I see them around the more elite areas and those where others are there to keep someone or something from others.

I now take a look at the scripture above and see how that concept applies to me. In order for me to separate and protect myself from others I need to build walls around me. I have to be able to keep the outside world from infecting me and that is done with my own self-control.

I have been been attacked by others as they do their best to draw me into a fight. And when I have allowed them to get under my skin and affect my emotions, I have played right into their hands and that has led to me being categorized as the one that was out of control and being unreasonable. I let myself go and as such have been exposed to the attack and left myself vulnerable to more people as they see me with my guard down and come in for the attack themselves.

When, by contrast, I have been able to keep my control and simply interact with the others, I come off as being attacked and have had others come to my defense. It is in the cool headed times that I have been able to manage the situations and turn the negative situation into a more open and honest conversation as opposed to the volatile attack it started as.

When I am in control of myself, I am able to defend myself, When I lose control, I seem to be on the defensive without any means of protection or separation. It is up to me to maintain my self-control to separate and protect myself for the attacks of others.

When you are attacked, what is your go to action? Are you one to lose your self-control and attack back? What if you were to maintain you self-control and separate and protect yourself?

As I finish my study today on the word “shine(s)” I am taken to that glorious time of Christ’s return. I have read and watched those that claim to know what the rapture will look and feel like, but I have also remained realistic in “how can they know, they have not experienced it”. I have come to trust that which is from God to lean on Him for information with all things.

“²⁷For as the lightning comes from the east and shines as far as the west, so will be the coming of the Son of Man.” – Matthew 24:27 (ESV)

These words come from Christ, and they are where my trust lies. You see, Christ will be coming back in a flash and all will know. He will shine bright for all to see, and those of us that have trusted Him and accepted the gift of salvation will be taken home with Him and those that have not accepted will be left wondering what it was they missed. Either way, we will all see the light that shines that is Christ.

Light shining in the darkness is unmistakable. I am not able to miss the bright headlight of a train coming down the track in the darkness of night. I know that I will not miss the flash of light that is Christ when He returns. I won’t even have to look for it, I will know when He comes. You will know when He returns as well based on His light that shines for all to see.

Will you be aware of what the light that shines on Christ’s return means? Are you going to see and wonder or will you see and rejoice? Christ shines today, and will shine bright for all to see when He returns, will you be prepared for the light that is Christ?

Proverbs 4 in my ESV Bible is titled “A Father’s Wise Instruction”, and it speaks to following the path of righteousness in verse 18.

“¹⁸But the path of the righteous is like the light of dawn, which shines brighter and brighter until full day.” – Proverbs 4:18 (ESV)

I should be seeking and following that path from the time I wake to the full day and beyond. The thing is that I have to be looking for the path in the right place. God provides that path and as my Heavenly Father, there is no better place to get the direction.

As a father myself, it is my duty to make sure that my sons are aware of, and seek to follow the righteous path themselves. I have to be sure and instruct them to look to God for the path they are to take, and avoid those that would maybe be there to lead them down the wrong, wicked, path.

“¹⁶For they cannot sleep unless they have done wrong; they are robbed of sleep unless they have made someone stumble. ¹⁹The way of the wicked is like deep darkness; they do not know over what they stumble.” – Proverbs 4:16 & 19 (ESV)

I, and more certainly God, wants nothing but the best for my sons. In order for them to have that, they have to follow the best path for them, and that path is provided by God and full of light. Those around us, whereas they may be our “friends and family” are not the same friends and family we find in God.

I am grateful for the glory given me by God and the light He shines on the path He has for me. I have only to follow that path to the life that He has for me and I must do all I can to avoid the path of the wicked and the darkness that engulfs that path.

As you walk in the world, are you aware of those that work to take you down the path of the wicked? Will you take a closer look at the path provided by God? Are you willing to work to take the path of the righteous that shines bright?