I was led to the below passage in Deuteronomy this morning as I continue to study the work “obey”. Before I present the passage, I want to disclaim that one has to look deeper at the verse and work to understand as opposed to picking out certain pieces that “justify” the actions taken.
“18If a man has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey the voice of his father or the voice of his mother, and, though they discipline him, will not listen to them, 19then his father and his mother shall take hold of him and bring him out to the elders of his city at the gate of the place where he lives, 20and they shall say to the elders of his city, ‘This our son is stubborn and rebellious; he will not obey our voice; he is a glutton and a drunkard.’ 21Then all the men of the city shall stone him to death with stones. So you shall purge the evil from your midst, and all Israel shall hear, and fear.” – Deuteronomy 21:18-21 (ESV)
This passage seems a bit extreme when we are dealing with our own children, but the “punishment” for not obeying is worth noting.
As a parent, I have the responsibility to teach the children that God has placed in my care. I am to guide them to Christ and present salvation to them. I am to be the example they look to as they grow in this world. I am also there to teach discipline and carry out discipline when they are disobedient. I do however have to be careful as to the reasoning behind the punishments handed out to be sure that they are in line with the action driving me to discipline.
In the above passage the “punishment” is not for the son/child getting into trouble in town and having to deal with the authorities. This disobedience is in direct conflict with the fifth commandment as laid out by God to honor your father and your mother. By not obeying your father and mother, you are separating yourself from the teachings they have been charged by God to bring to you. As such the example you are setting is not one in line with God and therefor are not fit to be the child of your parents and the discipline that follows is/must be drastic.
As I read this passage and those that go along with it, including the commentaries, I was challenged to understand as I mentioned in the opening paragraph. I could not see how one could have their child stoned just for not obeying, until I read the commentary indicating the fifth commandment. Oh how eye opening it was to see that it was not about the disobedience, but about the relationship and discipline had with my father and mother.
I want to be clear, I am not a proponent of this type of punishment. The discipline is not about physically putting to death the son/child, it is about holding them to the standard set by God through me as the one placed here to guide them through their growth in the image of God. I am here to provide the example of what right looks like in the eyes of God and teach the discipline needed to work for Him each day.
When you are teaching your children, where are you drawing the lessons? Are you being the example of Christ for them to emulate? Will you punish them for the act of dishonor through disobedience?
Trevor's Thoughts 