Tag: Head

Husband, Be Head of Wife and House

Yes, husbands are to be the head of his wife and of the house.

“23For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.” – Ephesians 5:23 (ESV)

I know that in today’s society, it may be controversial to think this way. There is a belief that everyone should be ruler over their own selves. Individuality has infiltrated the home and there is no allegiance to the ruler of the house and everyone feels they should stand on their own.

The things is that if you are standing fully on your own, you are alone. We were meant to be one flesh with the other. Each in the marriage has a role and each are vital to the health and well being of the marriage. When we are individuals then we miss out of the joys of the marriage and the relationship that is meant to be. You see we cannot be devoted to our spouse if we are focused on ourselves.

“25Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,” – Ephesians 5:25 (ESV)

Husbands, we are called to be the head of our wives and our house. We are the leaders in both respects. We are called to give our all to our wives, not just part of us. We give ourselves up for them. We are not taking away the individual that is our wife, we are giving her a space to thrive where she is. We are loving her and giving her a place to not have to worry with what and how to do. We are giving her the opportunity to be safe and be loved and be all that she was meant to be, wife and mother and teacher and caregiver. We take away the burden of provider and protector. We are the leaders of our family and our house.

I believe that part of the problem in our world today is that husbands are absent from their roles. We have become complacent allow our wives to take on too much of the work. We exist to just be a figure in the marriage and not the leader of it. We are not the head of our wives and houses, we are members of the marriage and house. We are just another person in the family and hold no real value.

I know that in my house, Lori is my wife and mom to the boys and daughter to her mother and daughter in law to my mother. But she is also a teacher in the school. For 20 years she was mom to the boys and wife top me. She worked outside the home as a teacher (the next best thing to being a stay at home mom by the way). Now that the boys are out of the house, she has taken on additional roles that give her joy. But, even as she has expanded herself outside the home, she is still my wife and mom to the boys and will do any and everything to ensure that role is first in all that she does.

As her husband, I too have a role in the house and it is up to me to be in that role. I am her to provide and protect her. I am her to lead her and love her. I am here to be the one she turns to when they are not as she expects or believes them to be. I am her other half. I am head of the house and more importantly head of my wife.

What is your role as husband? Are you there as a figure only? What if you were to embrace the fact that you are provider, protector, and head of your wife and house?

Medicine in Our Heart

Yes, when I speak of medicine, I am speaking of medicine to heal not only our emotional sickness, but our physical sickness as well.

“22A joyful heart is good medicine,

but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.”

— Proverbs 17:22 (ESV)

I wonder if you have heard the saying, “laughter is the best medicine”. I know that I have and it is true, when we laugh, our mind leaps to a more positive perspective and our body is boosted with endorphins that relieve pain and tension. I currently have some knee pain that I am getting looked at by physicians, and where I will have to have something repaired, I also know that when I am having a good time with things, the pain seems to not affect me as bitterly.

Now, imagine joy in your life that streams from your heart. That joy is not just there in the heart, but moves from your heart to your head and out to the world. Our mental and physical selves would deal with less stress related pain and suffering and we would find relief. Where do we get such joy but from the LORD and His Word.

The LORD does not only bring joy, but we find joy in Him and the worship of Him. Anxiety comes from the unknown and deception. With the LORD, there is no deception, and where we may not know where things are going in the short run, our finality is determined. The LORD is truth and in that truth I can rely. And God’s love for me brings me a confidence that can only be described as joy. And that joy is great medicine to that which is against me.

Medicine in our heart starts with the Word of God which turns to joy in our heart which streams to our mind and body to relieve pain. Joy in our heart is the medicine of our lives. Yes, doctors are still important for the healing in some instances to take place, but in reality, they are not needed as with the joy of the LORD, we have all the medicine we need. And, if it is in the will of God, He will heal us fully without the hands of the doctors. We have all we “need” with the LORD in our heart.

What medicine are you looking for to heal you? Are you looking to outside remedies? What if you were to look inward to the joy of the LORD in your heart and allow Him to be the medicine that heals?

Not Just External, But Internal

“14Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart

be acceptable in your sight,

O LORD, my rock and my redeemer.”

— Psalm 19:14 (ESV)

How often have we been “in” a conversation, speaking and hearing, but not really there at all as we are distracted by other goings on. I know that I have and I will admit, that in my prayers and calls on God I am not always there. When I look back, I find that I may have said the right things, but in my head and heart I am distracted and not really in the conversation with God at all. I am reminded this morning that it is not just with our mouth we are to be in commune with God, but our hearts are to me fully engaged as well.

I know that I am “cherry picking” one verse this morning, and I have spoken against that in the past, but hear me out. The title of the passage in my ESV bible this morning is, “The Law of the LORD is Perfect”. That being so, why would we allow ourselves to be distracted away from Him. I know that in sports I long to see things that are identified as “perfect”, the perfect game pitched in baseball, the perfect shot in golf, the perfect pass, or the perfect routine in gymnastics. I am mesmerized in those instances and my focus in fully on the moment. I have to ask myself, if those things are identified as perfect and I am fully engaged, why would I be distracted from the one true perfect one in our LORD.

It is up to me to devote myself to the LORD and what better way to start my days than to fully engage with Him in my prayer. From my mouth to my heart, I am to be mesmerized by Him and His perfection. I am to be all in with Him and allow the LORD to be the captivator of my entire self. I should be with Him both externally and internally.

How is your prayer with the LORD? Are you going through the motions eternally while being distracted internally? What if you were to fully engage in the perfection of the LORD and devote yourself to Him with your words and your heart and allow Him to captivate you?

Choose to Believe

“16For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.” – John 3:16 (ESV)

This morning I was taken to what is likely the most well known verse in God’s Word, John 3:16. It is so well known that it has been seen at all types of public events, sports games, concerts, and countless others. People will have it with them for all to see, but how many are clued into fully the weight of this verse.

In my study this morning, James MacDonald writes, “The key word that unlocks the door to John 3:16 is believe. And believe always includes choice.”

Isn’t that true. We have to choose in order to believe. I was reminded in my study that even being undecided is a choice. Choices are not binary but have additional options that are not really considered. For example, believe or not believe or just walk away from the idea altogether. There are three options, not just the two initially thought. So therefore, being undecided is a choice just as the other two.

Too often, we find something to carry as a badge. Whether a verse, a quote, a poem, a way of doing things, or any number of others. We have chosen to carry the badge and in a lot of cases, we believe in our heads that it is quite the good thing. And where that badge may be powerful in your head and impacts other when seen, is it in your heart as well as your head.

I choose God’s Love. I have seen in my study the value and impact of God’s Love. I have taken it to the point where it is firmly implanted in my head. I have believed in my head. Where that is a great place to start, I have to be honest with myself in applying my belief to my heart as well. I have to connect the two. I have to take the intellectual belief and infuse emotional belief to gain the full value and impact of God’s Love.

I am not saying that I have not done so. What I am saying is that I have to be conscious of my belief. I have to choose to connect my head and my heart through belief in God’s Love. I have to know that whether situations are good or hard, leaning on God’s Love is that which will get me through.

Let’s go back to John 3:16. Look closely at this verse. See that God’s Love is demonstrated in what He did for you and me. He gave His Son to die so we would not have to. Jesus, His only Son. And why did He send Jesus, because He loves us. He chooses to love us. He chose to save us from our sin. The sin that we brought upon ourselves and have no escape on our own. He chose to afford us eternal life with Him. God’s Love is for us and I choose to believe.

Where is your belief? Do you choose belief, unbelief, or are you walking away? What if you made the choice to believe with both your head and your heart to know that you can lean on God’s Love regardless of the situations you find yourself in?