Find an Excellent Wife

“¹⁰An excellent wife who can find?

She is far more precious than jewels.”

— Proverbs 31:10 (ESV)

A bit challenging for sure to find an excellent wife. How can we know?

Finding an excellent wife is something that all of us are wanting. I know that I found one in Lori. As you look further into verses 10-31 of Proverbs 31, we see the qualities that make an excellent wife and Lori fulfills them.

You see it is about devotion to the LORD and to the husband and the household that make her excellent. Not that she is the crown jewel of physical beauty to others in the community. It is not that everyone sees her and some trophy at my side. It is not that she is at the forefront of every event or organization. It is simply her devotion to God, family, and home. Lori is all of those things and I tell people all the time that I am spoiled by her and having her as my wife.

We find our excellent wife by looking in the right places to start. We can find her in the house of the LORD. We can find her following in the patterns of her mother. We can find her actions as she is growing up. She is out there waiting for us, we only have to go looking for her.

I remember hearing growing up that I was the kind of man to marry, not to date. I was thoughtful and caring and measured. Not exciting or risky. I see the excellent wife as having similar qualities. She is the one who puts others before herself. She is more concerned with consistency and contentment than the thrill of what could be. She has beauty, beauty found in her love and care and devotion. These are the things of the excellent wife and when you look at the verses of Proverbs 31 this is what you will find.

Finding an excellent wife is not hard, it is just something that we have to seek. It is easy to look for a wife, but it takes patience, determination, conviction to find the excellent wife. We have to know where to look and what to look for and not just see what is on the outside. We can find the excellent wife when we look where God directs.

What is an excellent wife to you? Are you looking for the physical trophy wife to hang on your arm? What if you were to find the excellent wife that God has for you, the one who is caring and measured and is devoted to Him, you, and the household?

Husbands Wear Your Crown

What a statement. We as husbands are to wear our crown. I will not shy away from that when I consider my crown.

“⁴An excellent wife is the crown of her husband,

but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones.”

— Proverbs 12:4 (ESV)

See here what is my crown, my wife. And Lori is certainly a/the crown to wear. When we go out, she is the best of me. People think of her before they think of me. I am Mrs. Flisowski’s and/or Lori’s husband in most circles. She is the thing that makes me something in this world.

I find it interesting that Lori is Lori with those that I know, yet I am her husband with those that she knows or who know her. I am the tag along with her and she is the better of me when with me. She is the crown that makes me someone. She is what people see first when they see me, and a beautiful sight she is.

Before you ask, no, everything in our home is not always in order. We do not function in an environment without any conflict. We argue plenty. We even mention to one another and others that we do not always like one another. But the love I have for her and she for me does not quit. She knows that I would do anything for her and I know the same. She is the object of my affection and is rightfully identified as my crown.

What is your wife to you? Is she the woman behind you? What is she was the crown that others see when they see you?

Where to Find Your Wife

Where is the best place to find your wife. Well, being that your wife is from the LORD, I would say that she can be found in the House of the LORD.

“¹⁰An excellent wife who can find?

She is far more precious than jewels.”

— Proverbs 31:10 (ESV)

I have written that your wife is from the LORD. We tend to look for the LORD to just present her to us wherever we might be. And where that is He can, isn’t in our best interest to go looking in the place we know her to be, in the House of the LORD. The question in the verse above is a good one and can be answered if/when we are looking in the right place.

I have said and maintain that the smartest people in the world do not know all the answers to all the questions, they do however know that the answers are out there, and will look for them in the logical places. So, where is the logical place to find an excellent wife who is from the LORD, in His House of course.

Lori and I have moved a couple of times in our lives together. In each time, we have made it a priority to find a church that we can call home. On graduation Sunday, our church gives to the seniors a devotional and a list of churches to plug into where they are headed. These acts alone did not or do not guarantee that you will find your wife, but the odds are certainly in your favor. When we are in the place where an excellent wife would be, our chances of connecting to the wife from God drastically increase.

Now, I do want to be careful to say that you are not out there hunting for a wife in the surrounding churches. What I am saying is that when you are plugged in at the church and doing the work of God, He will show her to you and it will be clear that she is from the LORD.

I cannot say that I found my wife Lori at the church, but what I can say is that we are both God fearing and involved in our church and for that I know that she is from the LORD. Each of us knows that the other will be there in/for the LORD and that is where we find comfort. I know that Lori is the excellent wife the LORD provided for me and I know that I can find her in the LORD.

Where are you looking for your wife? Are you hoping to find her randomly? What if you went to do the work of the LORD in His House, knowing that is the place where an excellent wife will be found?