“³¹Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” — Ephesians 5:31 (ESV)

I have seen this verse before in my study of “leave” and that was just a few days ago in Genesis. I wrote to “Leave to move forward with another”. I was speaking of pursuing your wife and leaving your family behind to devote yourself to her. Here I am looking at it again and see something else that I thought was of note, becoming one.

This concept of becoming one seems to be counter to a society that speaks to individualism. If I am to become one with another, how is it that I am an individual? I understand the question, and when you look at things from only one perspective, it is something that may be a bit counter. I hold that it is indeed not counter to society in that being one with another is having the same values and approach and understanding as the other, not that you and the other cannot be different.

Lori and I are very different people. She is outgoing and enthusiastic and loves to be in the thick of things. I on the other hand like solitude and quiet. We are however one in that we are headed in the same direction. We decide together on those things that are of importance. We go together as opposed to separately. We support one another in all that we strive to accomplish. We are one.

I encourage Lori to take time for herself and do those things that she wants to do, and she does the same with and for me. I want her to be her and enjoy the things she enjoys. I need that time as well. But, when it comes to our values and direction we are one. Our church home changed, not by one of us, but both. Our drive for our boys and their study and college of choice was of the same accord. Our care for those around us is aligned and we are one in those actions.

I left my family to become one with Lori, and she did the same for me. We press forward as one unit in those areas that are of importance to the two of us. We are still individuals and we would not take that away from either of us as that is what gives us the ability to see things from different angles and adds to the alignment in decision making.

What were the reasons for your leaving with your husband or wife? Are you aligned, or are you clinging to the idea of being an individual? What if you looked to be one with each other and allowed your differences to show the other angle to aid in moving the right direction for the one that is the two of you?

I will admit that there are times when I feel all alone in this world and in my work for God. I feel as though I am fighting the uphill battle each day with little to no guidance or acknowledgment that I am even heading in the right direction.

“¹⁶And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever, ¹⁷even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him, for he dwells with you and will beg in you. ¹⁸I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. ¹⁹Yet a little while and the world will see me no more, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live.” — John 14:16-19 (ESV)

Jesus left this world, yes, but He did not leave us alone in this world. I have to remember that God provided the Helper, the Holy Spirit, to guide and direct me. When things are the toughest, the Holy Spirit is there to pick me up and give me the strength to persevere. I may not feel as though I am getting help to make it through, but I do make it through and have to remember that it was the Holy Spirit that gave me just enough. I don’t need reserves to indicated that I had enough to make it, I need just enough and that is was I am provided.

“²⁶But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you. ²⁷Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” — John 14:26-27 (ESV)

Jesus left, yes, but He does not leave us here alone. The Holy Spirit was summoned to provide the guidance we need. Providing teaching and strength to persevere through all that comes our way. I have to remember that I am not alone and have the Helper here to do just that, help me in doing the work for God.

Jesus will be back as He says there in verse 18. He did not leave us here and forget about us. He will return and take us home with Him. In the mean time, the Helper, the Holy Spirit is here for me to lean on when I need. Whether in those times of difficulty or even in those times of joy. The Holy Spirit is there for me to guide and comfort me in all that I do. Giving me just enough to make it through and on to the next that God has in store for me.

What do you feel as though you are out there all alone attempting to accomplish? Are you really out there going it alone? What if you stepped back to realize that the Helper is there, provided by God, so that we are not alone, and that Helper is there to provide just enough for us to make it through?

Marriage is for the lifetime. When one marries, that union is meant for the lifetime, “til death do us part”. Oh how great it would be if that were the prevailing sentiment in society. Man leaves his family to be with his wife for the duration of his life and the wife is to devote herself to her husband for that same timeline.

“³And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, ‘Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?’ ⁴He answered, ‘Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, ⁵and said, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh”? ⁶So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” — Matthew 19:3-6 (ESV)

Marriage is a bind for a lifetime and one shall not leave that union. Where love is nothing else can separate. When there is love and compassion and understanding, there is a desire to continue and fight.

I will be the first to admit that not every day is all roses, butterflies, and rainbows with my wife Lori, and I know that she will say the same thing. There are days that we just do not like each other very much. The thing is, those are moments in time and there is no loss of love. Our union was built on Christ and love and those never fail. One moment in time does not trump a lifetime. There has not been a legitimate reason to do away with our love based on a moment in time.

When there is a union between two, that union is for a lifetime and should be honored as such. “Thou shalt not leave” should be the rallying cry for all in a lifetime relationship with another.

When you are looking at your relationship with your spouse, what timeline are you looking at for the relationship? Are you looking at the moments in time? What if you were to approach from the view of lifetime union and took the mantra of “Thou shalt not leave”?

Man was not made to be alone. God created man and woman and made them to be together.

“²²And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. ²³Then the man said, ‘This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.’ ²⁴Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” — Genesis 2:22-24 (ESV)

God meant for man to “leave” his home and be fully with woman. When I read these verses, I see that man is to be the pursuer of woman. I am to be the one out there looking for her and seeking to care for her and protect her and be there. I am so comforted with the companionship that I have with my wife.

When pursuing Lori, I may have been somewhat distant to my family. I may have been focused on her a bit too much. I may have had my eye on her and only on her. But, as I read, isn’t that the way things should be. I have to leave my family to be with her and create a life for the two and more of us. I am to seek and be in the relationship with her fully and devote myself to her and all that is that relationship. There is and will be time to be with my family knowing that there is another or more that have been added to it. I am to engage and be fully with her and all that is her as we seek a life together.

A number of years ago, we, as a family, moved from our home town to another part of the country and frankly upset our families that we had done so. I felt bad for it in the beginning, but realized that it was what was best for our family of four (me, Lori, Bryson, and Aarron). I/we left to be our own and in that time, we became closer and more alive as a family unit as we were thrust into relying on each other and finding friends to interact with as well. We were able to find a church family and good friends that we loved and they loved us back. We had moved forward, together and it was great.

I have to remember that leaving to be with Lori was God’s plan for my and we are still leaving together everywhere we go.

What relationship have you devoted to that you would move out with them? Are you willing to leave to pursue them? What if you found the one that God had in store for you and struck out with them to create your own life together?

I am sure that we are all aware that there is a decided difference between we and thee. What I am describing is the difference in the classes of people in the world. And I am not just speaking of the US or any other place. There are the elites and there is everyone else. We like to think that everyone is equal (at least we like to use the words to say so). The reality is that there are those that have and those that have not.

We see this just about everywhere. Sporting events, yes, everyone has the equal right to sit or partake in the viewing of the contest from anywhere, but is those elites that can afford or have been “granted” or have “won” the chance to sit close enough. In business, the parking lots are filled with those that conduct the work for the business, yet the closest and/or covered parking is for those with the highest positions in the company.

Now before we get too far into the debate of politics or social justice, I want to be clear that I am only making the above points to draw attention to my study this morning. I am still in the study of the word “liberty” and this morning’s passage in James is about partiality. I read and was reminded this morning that I am to treat everyone with the same liberty, regardless of their station or position.

“¹My brothers, show no partiality as you hold the faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory. ²For if a man wearing a gold ring and fine clothing comes into your assembly, and a poor man in shabby clothing also comes in, ³and if you pay attention to the one who wears the fine clothing and say, ‘You sit here in a good place,’ while you say to the poor man, ‘You stand over there,’ or, ‘Sit down at my feet,’ ⁴have you not then made distinctions among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts?” — James 2:1-4 (ESV)

I know that I have to be careful when interacting with people to be sure that I am treating everyone with the same equal liberty. In my role as a trainer, everyone in class is my favorite. Everyone has unique talent to make the group stronger. I am called on to bring that talent to light for everyone to benefit. I am responsible to maintain each person’s self-esteem to be sure that they realize their value to the whole.

We are all called on to treat everyone equally. There are those that can “afford” other, more elite things based on the lives they have built for themselves, and I have no argument or animosity toward them or what they have accumulated as a result of the hard work they have done. That, however, is not a basis for treating them differently than those that cannot “afford” the elite things. When the elite things are stripped away, the elites are no different than others.

“¹²So speak and so act as those who are to be judged under the law of liberty. ¹³For judgment is without mercy to one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment.” — James 2:12-13 (ESV)

My role is to provide liberty to all I come in contact. I am to treat everyone as equal in the eyes of God. I am to serve as the example of how Christ would act and I know that He would bring all together in the same room and give them all the same seats and speak direct with each and every one of them equally.

What have you seen that are the divides among people? Do you find yourself giving way to those “elites” over others, simply based on their status? What if you treated everyone with the same liberty that Christ would, all are equal?

Each year I choose a word to guide my learning and actions. For 2023 I have chosen the word “act” with the intent that I have heard, accumulated, and learned a lot, now is the time to act on those hearings, accumulations, and learning.

“²²But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.” — James 1:22 (ESV)

This morning I was brought to the book of James for my reading and study of the word “liberty”. This was the first verse in the passage that caught my eye other than the verse related to liberty. I was again enlightened by God to my word choice for the year. I am to be acting on the Word of God and not just simply hearing and keeping it to myself. All others need to see my actions as those speak louder than just the words we use.

“²³For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. ²⁴For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like.” — James 1:23-24 (ESV)

Just knowing the Word of God is not enough, I have to act on it to ensure that everyone has the opportunity to experience His love for themselves. I have to act with the freedom and liberty that I have been given through my acceptance of Christ as my savior.

“²⁵But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing.” — James 1:25 (ESV)

I am to act on the liberty and not just know about it. I have to be in the work and working with my liberty as provided by Christ. I am the one who has to show who and what Christ is and not just keep Him to myself and think selfishly that I have something that others do not. I have to work to give everyone the opportunity to have what I have in Christ and experience the love and freedom that comes with that gift from Him.

What liberty and freedoms do you have in your life that you tend to keep to yourself? Are you working to act on and with the liberty provided by Christ? What if you did not keep God’s Word to yourself and demonstrated to all, through your actions, the love and liberty provided by Christ?

This morning as I continue to study the word “liberty” I am led to a passage in 1 Corinthians where Paul is instructing to “Do all to the Glory of God”. He is specifically speaking to eating at someone’s home and partaking in food that may or may not have bee used as a sacrifice. In his letter, Paul had already addressed the eating of sacrificed food in public and that it should not be done for the sake of others.

“²⁷If one of the unbelievers invites you to dinner and you are disposed to go, eat whatever is set before you without raising any question on the ground of conscience. ²⁸But if someone says to you, “This has been offered in sacrifice,” then do not eat it, for the sake of the one who informed you, and for the sake of conscience— ²⁹I do not mean your conscience, but his. For why should my liberty be determined by someone else’s conscience?” — 1 Corinthians 10:27-29 (ESV)

Paul indicates here that in the private home, we should be the gracious guest and accept what is given for what it is, and not what it “may” represent. When presented without any description, then there is nothing to discuss. As the receiver, I am just here to partake and not to question the validity of that which is served.

Now when the host announces the origin of the meal and it is contrary to our beliefs, we should abstain so that they are able to see the glory of God in all that we do. My goal is to spread the gospel to all and bring glory to God in the process. When I am accepting of something that I know to be out of bounds, I may cause the host to stumble in the glory of God. I am not to do anything that would cause another to stumble in their faith. As a follower of Christ I live under the New Covenant and have been granted liberty to eat and partake in things that under the old covenant, may have been forbidden.

“⁷However, not all possess this knowledge. But some, through former association with idols, eat food as really offered to an idol, and their conscience, being weak, is defiled. ⁸Food will not commend us to God. We are no worse off if we do not eat, and no better off if we do. ⁹But take care that this right of yours does not somehow become a stumbling block to the weak.” — 1 Corinthians 8:7-9 (ESV)

I am not to do anything that may cause another to stumble in their faith. If that means that I should abstain from something that I am not prohibited from partaking to maintain the conscious of another, then that is what I should do. I have to remember that my role is to bring glory to God and spread His Word to all. When I openly cause another to stumble I am not fulfilling my role.

What are you doing that you know to be right that may cause another to question? Are you thinking of only your own rights and liberty and not theirs? What if you thought of others first and their salvation and bringing glory to God instead of holding fast to those things that are allowed that may cause others to stumble in their faith?

When I think of liberty, I think of that which is a part of the United States and the idea that I have freedom from tyranny and freedom of expression and freedom of religion and freedom of just about anything else one can think. I believe that freedom is a right that has been bestowed on me thanks to my living here and that it cannot be infringed upon. That is not fully true.

I have liberty as a child of God, but that liberty is from the bounds of sin and nothing else. I am still held to all that is before me, only in the wake of sin in my life, I have been forgiven.

“¹The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound;” — Isaiah 61:1 (ESV)

It is of sin that I have been forgiving and from the consequences of sin I am protected. I have been guaranteed nothing else in this life. I am free from sin and that is all.

The best part is that it is not just in the United States this freedom and liberty are available. Whether I am here, or traveling abroad to anywhere, God is with me and provides safety and liberty from the bounds of sin. I am free and for that I am thankful.

Now, I don’t just get to experience the freedom from sin. I have work to do, and that work is continual. I have to follow God wherever He would have me go and do whatever He would have me do. I have to do His work. To go along with the work He has for me, I have to repent continually for the sins I have committed and know as well as those I have committed and do not know (for they are there for sure). Just because I have been forgiven and have accepted Christ as my Savior and Lord, I am still a sinner and will struggle with sin each day. The evil one will continually come for me and just when I let my guard down and forget the work I am doing for God, he will be there to influence me in the wrong direction to take away my freedom.

Liberty is a gift from God and for that gift, I am obligated for thanks to Him. I have to remember that I have freedom, not from what the world might think, but from the consequences of sin as that debt has been paid.

What freedoms do you have in your life? Do you realize that those freedoms can be removed at any time? What if you put your faith in the one freedom that has been granted and will not be taken away, the freedom from sin?

Have you every found yourself in a group or in a position where action needs to take place, yet there continues to be debate and discussion that delays action from being taken? I know that I have and find that everyone seems to be polite and inclusive to everyone so that everyone has a voice in the situation. Where this may be the right thing in the interest of the inclusive ideal, this is not always the right thing needed in every situation and there for leads to indecision and potentially missing the opportunity to take action at all.

This indecision is a decision. Let me explain my position. The group has decided that everyone’s voice is more important than actually taking action. The action itself then falls further down the list of priorities and therefor is delayed in the interest of consensus or good will toward others. What is decided is of little to no concurrence as long as everyone has had a chance to weigh in and/or debate. Where this is a grand idea and can lead to an environment where everyone gets along, the action that was needed takes a back seat and in some cases, no seat at all, to the ideal of inclusion.

There have been a number of occasions where I have been in a group of people trying to decide where to go to eat. Each member is asked where they would like to go and inevitably someone in the group objects, for whatever reason, and the debate continues. Meanwhile, there are those that are in the breakfast conversation to fellowship with friends and the place that happens is not important. The debate continues for 15 minutes only to decide on a place that is no longer serving due to the timing we would be able to arrive, and the process begins again. The indecision results in a canceling of the plans due to time constraints that would have been avoided had someone just made the decision to go as opposed to then needed consensus as to where. The reality is that the where was not as important as the why and due to the indecision, the why was not accomplished.

I am not saying that all decisions should just be made and inclusion is not important, it is. What I am saying is that at some point, the decision needs to be made so that we can get on with things and take action as opposed to just talking about action. Jesus was saying this to the people of Laodicea in Revelation.

“¹⁵I know your works: you are neither cold nor hot. Would that you were either cold or hot! ¹⁶So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth.” — Revelation 3:15-16 (ESV)

When action is needed, decisions must be made. Standing around debating the decision may work in minor inconsequential situations. When things come after and require additional actions to be taken, those decisions must be made. Sometimes the whole is of more consequence than the part when it comes to decisions. The situations drives the decision making process. It is important to look at the larger picture to understand the whole and decide on the actions that should take place to satisfy the situation’s need as opposed to the decision’s need.

What actions have you seen that were delayed or canceled due to indecision or apathy? Were you one that was more interested in the decision than the situation? What if we reviewed the reason for the decision and decided to take action as opposed to deciding to decide and not taking the action?

I recently wrote about self-control is used to avoid the trappings of lust and this morning I read in 2 Peter of the willful entering into the trapping.

“¹⁰and especially those who indulge in the lust of defiling passion and despise authority. Bold and willful, they do not tremble as they blaspheme the glorious ones,” — 2 Peter 2:10 (ESV)

There is a lot that goes into the full passage here in 2 Peter, this verse was the basis of my study this morning and really spoke to me of the choice I have each day and in all situations. Again God provides what I need when I need it. He brought me to this passage to extend on the self-control learning from my recent writing.

Here we see the relationship between self-control and a choice. If I have the ability to control myself and avoid the trappings of lust, I also have the choice to avoid lust and not allow myself to enter into that trapping. I know, they sound the same and as I write I know that. Stay with me.

I have choice in life. I have the choice of right and wrong. I have the choice to wear blue or red. I have the choice to mow the grass or pay someone. I have the choice to long after something destructive or something that brings glory and honor.

See what I did there (or maybe not). I have the choice of lust. It not something that is just innate and a part of me. I choose my own actions. God gave me free will and that includes the ability to choose. I have the choice to willfully act against that which is best, and lust is certainly not that. I have the chance each day to choose God over my own desires. I have the chance each day to choose to do His will or go it on my own. I have the choice to bring the gospel to the world or bring my own desires.

Too often I see that people shuck the blame for their own actions and either throw the blame on another person. They will claim that it was some inability to control the situation and they are somehow the victim, when they were the one that created the situation. This is simply the excuses of those not realizing that they have and made a choice and are now looking to somehow remove the consequences of the choices that were made.

We have a choice to make at every moment of the day. That choice is ours and we are responsible for that choice and by extension, the consequences that come with that choice. Sometimes those consequences are positive, and others times, not so much. The choice is yours as are the consequences that go with them.

What choices are you making in your own life? Are you falling into the trappings of lust by choosing that destructive path? What if you stepped back, understood that you have free will, thanks to God and chose to honor Him with your work instead?